Work in Progress

Overhead signs flicker slowly;
‘On Time’, ‘Delayed’, ‘Cancelled’.
In a place, at its very core,
A microcosm of transience,
I saw that the static,
The dragging,
The monotonous
Moments in our days
Carry the most weight.

The fleeting seconds of joy,
Hours of anger,
Are empty chasms of air.
Only once we pause,
Return to our true selves,
And become creatures of habit,
Do we yield from the harsh winters
Giving way to downy springs.

‘On Time’
I scuff my shoes across the tarmac,
‘Delayed’
Patience is a virtue they say,
‘Cancelled’
Perhaps I have been waiting too long.

~Lady Rainicorn

Author’s Note:

I hate the opening and closing lines, and am working on them, but for now they’re just pretty basic, so you get what I’m saying. Did you catch my Lord of the Flies reference? Bit sneaky. But also very relevant. Obviously I wrote this waiting for the train. Whilst analysing Heaney, I scribbled it in my poetry book, ‘shhhh’ don’t tell the teacher, anyway, all and any feedback is greatly appreciated~

MY OTP JUST GOT ENGAGED

MY OTP JUST GOT ENGAGED

Wow, this week has been a whirlwind of fangirl emotions. And personal emotions. But that’s going in a different post.  Anyway, Kurt and Blaine got back together to a fantastic rendition of ‘Got to get you into my life’, which was painfully appropriate and it hurt my heart to watch Kurt winding Blaine up about them getting together when he was clearly going to say yes all along! However my inner Kurt stan was squealing with joy! We finally got our strong and independent Kurt back. Headstrong and not afraid to fight for what he wants (or play with what he wants because that was mean).
And the fact they both planned serenades for each other- every Klaine fic suddenly became canon. Moments so perfectly in character like that only happen in the mind of seriously hardcore shippers- for any ship- and I’m eternally grateful that Klaine are such a beautiful couple that the people who actually created them want them to be together forever.

Blaine stan time. He is amazing. He got these show choirs to propose to his boyfriend- HIS ACTUALLY GAY BOYFRIEND IN OHIO OF ALL PLACES- choirs who have tried to blind each other, ruined each others reputations, stolen star performers, repeatedly, stolen each others set lists, and more than once emotionally manipulated each other. Blaine Anderson is such a perfect picture of somebody who focuses on the good, tries so hard to make everybody get along and is picture perfect. He’s flawed though- I’ll say that.  He loves so hard, so much, all the time, and we all know how much that can hurt. How easily that kind of blind devotion gets thrown back in your face at the drop of a hat.  He’s finally found someone to give all his love to. He’s been looking for him forever- in every life- and now he can sit him down and serenade him with the entire Beatles repertoire and every single time Kurt will give him those heart eyes we first saw in Blackbird.

Every single lifetime, they find each other.  And following the theory of infinite universes, somewhere, somehow, Blaine Anderson and Kurt Hummel are real people, living real lives, maybe they met, and maybe will meet, but I’m just so ecstatic that in this universe, we get to watch them have a whole life together, we get to watch the ultimate ‘Teenage Dream’ play out.

The search is over.

~Lady Rainicorn

“I used to believe…

“I used to believe in forever, but forever’s too good to be true.”
– A.A. Milne, Winnie the Pooh

Now… while not everyone in the whole World may have heard of Winnie the Pooh (sadly), they will have at one point, experience this sheer feeling of contentment, it a second, or throughout their life. That one moment where you feel as if you want to preserve it forever, and you believe that it would never end.

Unfortunately, life is rarely so kind and unforgiving, and before you know it, you’re back in the ‘real World’ – having to suffer through a monotonous lull that is your existence. As a child, you might be willing to think that you can remember all the things you loved, and sometimes, if you wished ‘hard enough’, that TV show, or ice cream cone would never end. Then, as you get older, and wiser, you come to learn that there are such things as endings, and even if you loved the characters enough to call them family, or you would be willing to eat that particular sweet for the rest of your life – you simply cannot.

Since it is in human nature to never let things go (sometimes), we are taught to deal with the loss, and that forever simply cannot be. Even if science were to allow us to live beyond the realm of time, what would that make us? Lonely? It’s hard to think about existence in a timeline that stretches on, for an eternity, and then some.

Whether it’s an event, novel or place in particular, nothing is eternal, so our serviceable substitute,  we are now conditioned to believe that while things may not last forever, they always have a way of coming back to us. Sometimes, it is expected, sometimes,  it may be in  the most surprising way imaginable.

Even if we are not equipped to deal with even the concept of forever, I should think that holding things close to your heart ‘as long as possible’ shall suffice for now.

After all, isn’t it true, that…

    

No matter which fandom you are from, I’m sure you’ll appreciate while forever is beyond our grasp, at least this means we’ll never be alone.

~ Persephone

Omake:

Duet of the Century, courtsey of Shingeki no Kyojin

Fangirling about Shingeki no Kyojin aside, this is an amazing song. Played by two people whose piano skills are out of this World.

Of course, this theme is perfect for SnK regardless. The amount of ass kicking involved suits this adrenaline filled song entirely. Mostly done by the almighty Corporal Levi-sama. And maybe Eren as a Titan. Maybe.

  and then much …  spinning, more spinning~

And generally, a short but hot guy with this unexplainable attractive haircut that pwns all.

(At this point, I realised I should do separate posts about all my fandoms before my brain explodes with their sheer awesomeness.)

Not even kidding. I personally have Grade 8, which already stretch me too thinly and I can’t even explain how that miracle happened, but only that it did. However, we’re talking about another level entirely. When you reach this level, it’s almost as if you’ve achieved the status of a deity. Animenzzz and Tehishter. You guys deserve a -sama after your name.

Technically, this is a challenging piece of music for sure. The duet also means it’s not easy having to cooperate with another person, tempo wise – it’s a tough job. Then, let’s not forget that this song is sung with a whole host of guitars, drums etc. etc. You’re doing this on a piano. All of it. And it sounds good. Scratch that. OUT OF THIS WORLD, AMAZINGLY AWESOMESAUCE.

When I  listened to this (for the first time, of many)…

When can we start building the shrines and worshipping you guys?

Waiting for Sherlock Series 3

I effing hate Moffat.

We’ve waited for so long. Waited for Sherlock to show that he’s not dead and to kick some more ass with his beloved Watson. GODAMNIT!

Waiting for series 3 is like waiting for the ‘apocalypse’. Do you know when it will finally arrive? No. Do you know if your life is ever going to be the same again after it? No. I’m sure Tumblr has done a much better job of articulating this, and I know I’m not the only one in the fandom. But filming has finished. Can we finally get Benedict Cumberbatch back in a long coat and blue scarf? Oh, and of course, John’s moustache. I think everyone wants an explanation, as to why his way of dealing with the grief of losing his best friend is growing facial hair, that borders on flattering and disturbing.

Sometimes, I love the people who manage to turn something intended for the last century, Victorian era, and make it an obsession for the youths of the 21st century. But do you know what?! It’s damn hard waiting for something that doesn’t have an end. It’s like running around a Mobius strip. We wait months and what do we get? A trailer. A seconds long trailer that gives us nothing more than a glimpse of only the beginning of many viewings.

Of course, let’s not forget my Benaddiction!

If this was a thing like Jedi is a religion in the Census. I’d select it. No questions asked.

If every day we spent waiting for the next season to arrive was equated to tears we’ve shed for the fandom, we’d have enough liquid to drown Moffat. Painfully.

And you know what?

Give us Sherlock and no one (else) will get hurt.

~ Persephone

First week in the Underworld

So, what has gone on lately?

Sooo, sooo much.

First of all, my friend who lives in another country is coming on a plane, to England tomorrow. *squels* A cyber best friend is no good when all you want to do is fangirl and hug and cry together about all the shit in your fandom. *deep breath* But sooon we’ll have our time.

English. This is tough. I’m considering basing my whole future on this subject. And so far, I’m liking one teacher more than the other. I enjoy lessons about Victorian context, poetry, plays and novels – over Fingersmith our set text. O__O I know… It’s hard to get into the novel. I don’t know if it’s the writer, but I can read it, but I don’t particularly like it. It’s almost as if the writer is trying too hard? I miss Lady R, and most of all, I have had so much trouble deciding what to do with the Access to Bristol scheme chance. I know I’m just applying for it, and the chances of me even getting in are slim – but it’s something to consider beforehand. Missing lessons is a big deal for me, and even if it’s 2 English lit. lessons and 1 Biology lesson for 8 weeks (alternating) – it doesn’t sit well with me. Also, this idea of doing English as a career, taking it in uni? What will I do with English? Really become a teacher?! My ultimate goal of becoming a writer or anything remotely creative rests on only being a side job. *sighs*

Biology isn’t particularly anything really. Besides from the hardest subject – proteins (yes, I sound stupid, but the depth we’re going into now? It’s all about quaternary structures, α–helixes). And doing Biochemistry at uni is much like Law for me. It’s an idea but won’t go any further – probably. And as much as it sounds like Biomedical sciences, it’s not – but I would be researching medicine, I guess, if I took it.

Chemistry is all over the place. One teacher doesn’t really know what she does,  but is a good teacher regardless because she can engage the class and listen to our bad Chem jokes. But the other one? She’s old, deadpans and I don’t know what to make of her. And her face. Also, I’m not holding a grudge or anything, but I swear she rubbed me the wrong way too far when she talked about how she failed English because it was a useless subject anyway.

History – well, I can say I didn’t do too well for first impressions on homework. For some reason (I was ill and woozy, seriously I take so many drugs just to keep alive). But I’m better(ish) now! I mean, I’m still ill, but at least my liver won’t hate me so much for dosing up so much so I don’t come down with a fever or something.  I enjoy learning more about German and Anti-Semitism to an extent, before it becomes too repetitive. But Tsarist Russia? It’s hilariously worrying. What the heck was Alexander II thinking emancipating the serfs?! Oh, and of course, Hitler in Mein Kampf. Every revolutionary leader (well, different) is slightly wrong in the head, I swear.

All in all, I’m settling in more, for sure. And I’ve had lots to think about in terms of extra-curricular. I’m also doing Envision, for some debating and issue solving in and around our community. I’m taking up Japanese again (the hole is getting bigger) and then of course we’re back to Access to Bristol. Gosh damnit! I’m applying to do English. For sure. (Once I send the techies an email telling them how the online application is a massive fail and doesn’t work. Maybe volunteering for my Chinese school again. ALL FOR A CV.

I’ve also thought more about where I want to go for uni. Bristol, Birmingham and London are big city unis that are relatively close, so I’ll try them first. College wise, I guess Royal Holloway, and King’s for London. I’m not sure about Birmingham and Bristol though. Cambridge is a far away dream. A girl from Nishimiya went to Murray Edwards college there this year, and I’m obviously not going for Oxford, but I’ve got so many college ideas! St. Johns (Uncle Allan’s alma mater), King’s and Trinity Hall.

I have no words for what I’m feeling right now. Or what is going through my head 24/7 – except that it’s one big mess. *inner turmoil*

~ Persephone

One week in, still going strong

OK, so it’s been just over a week since starting my new school (should have done this on Saturday but nah), and so far it’s all going really well. Classes are hard, especially Maths and Law, but it’s a good kind of hard (hehe), challenging, which is what I’ve always wanted at school, so I’m having a whale of a time.

First off is Law which is very complex and mostly involves learning case after case after Latin phrase. The memorizing aside, it’s very interesting and the teacher is talkative and engaging, even though there are a lot of spelling and grammar errors in the handouts she gives us. I’m thinking about taking Latin GCSE in my spare time, I’m going to see the teacher on Wednesday to talk to him, but I’ve always secretly wanted to do it just to see what everyone is always on about and it’d be so helpful with my Law at the moment.

Secondly is Maths. I did a pre-AS test last Thursday which I needed to get 70% on, then I get one resit where I have to get 75% before I’m signed up for compulsory extra help. I’m getting the results tomorrow so I’ll know soon enough but it’s still quite scary seeing as none of the teachers even know my name, let alone my skill set. Otherwise Maths is going fine, not too bad, a little confusing at times, but I’m still getting used to new teaching styles.

Then there’s English. I’ve got a really nice table and we work really well together, but I’ve been put in a mixed group to work with one of my favorite people, Nike. Not looking forward to it, but as you said, there’s no point in holding grudges, so I will find common ground by talking about jazz music and hopefully we can produce a good project. I’m also reading 1984 for fun, which is absolutely amazing, just completely mind-blowing, the way Orwell contemplates the validity of absolutely everything, even our own thoughts, is fascinating, and sometimes scarily realistic.

Lastly, Computing. We’re starting work on binary code next lesson which is super super exciting and the other teacher is mostly doing boring standard old fact learning stuff. Sitting next to Mark who I think is my friend now, he keeps asking how I am, that is a friend thing right? Or do I look ill…

In response to your comments on a relaxed atmosphere, there are literally about five rules, and then they just trust you to use your common sense. It’s amazing, I fee like I’m finally growing up. The teachers always arrive late because they come all the way from main school then they just leave when they’re done with the lesson plan it’s great. I auditioned for West Side Story and it was terrifying, this woman just ran over this routine like twice then had us all perform it and my memory doesn’t work that quickly, so I basically just horrifically embarrassed myself in front of loads of people I don’t know. I’m going to join the Feminist Society, the French Society (yes I am still a Francophile I can’t turn it off), the rowing club (always secretly wanted to do that), the mooting society (pretend courts), and I’m volunteering my service to the KS3 English department.

So, life is looking up.
Also Glee.

“Life’s too short…

“Life’s too short, to waste time hating anyone.”
– Regina Brett

This is not really a quote, because I see it as a simple message to pass on from person to person.

These days, I find myself with increasingly larger workloads from school, so I’m forced to prioritise. I speak to the people I like, I choose my free time activities so that I make sure I don’t stress myself out.

Why should it be any different from grudges? Admittedly, I have this ability to hold grudges for long periods of time. In fact, I don’t think I’ve let go of a grudge before. This, now, seems to me like a time-wasting endeavour. Those people, who I hated a lot at one point of my life, can now be dealt with in a more mature manner. (Well, as mature as you can get by ignoring someone and not talking or seeing someone.)

However, when you think about it, it’s a possible act, and scientifically, Dunbar’s number justifies my being so selective about friends. I simply can’t uphold that many friendships! The more I think about it, the more I want to just forget about the people I hate, and only concentrate on my friends. Because they, are for life.

This applies to not just hatred, but things that would eat away at my life without me realising. Negative thinking. *dundundun* I mean, the constant thoughts of not being able to achieve anything, or having a chance of a wonderful future.

If everyone followed this quote, their life would already be much more fulfilling. And there would be a lot less hate in the World. Sometimes, people forget about their mortality (Memento Mori anyone?) and divulge themselves too much into their plans of World domination, warfare and the like. Really? That is what you want to spend your limited time on? Hate, death and more hate?  (I may be thinking of someone like Uchiha Sasuke when I say this. So. Much. Hate. And yes, I deliberately avoided the non-fictional people who wanted to destroy the World at one point, or sent it into turmoil.)

Just remember…

~ Persephone

On the Importance of Being in Sixth Form

So, the main point of this post is to tell the World just how busy both Lady R and I are. Seriously.

That meant the lack of time and energy to write anything substantial – besides having copious amounts of effort needed to type something out. However, I am determined not to let work overtake my life. So I’m going to just have to link school-life with… whatever this is…

In my school, sixth form is something different altogether. I’m not sure if Lady R is going to write a post about her school, but in all honestly, my school is much more structured and strict than hers. Our dress code, is what you would wear to an office, suits and heels (not for me, since I need to do lots of legwork – more about this later).

This new territory meant more freedom – however, in other fields. For example, I was now allowed nail polish, jewellery and my hair down. It’s a complete 360 degrees change from being in secondary school. Also, the way teachers now treated us as a whole. An example would be the hilarious Chemistry lesson I had just this Friday afternoon. All 10 (ish) of my classmates had arrived in the lab, expecting to see our teacher there. Only to find that she wasn’t, and moreover, after waiting for over 5 minutes. She was nowhere to be found. At this point, my friend pointed out how she had seen Mrs B going out for tea with some other teachers in our school. Had she forgotten about us?

Oh we wish. In a moment of complete idiocy, no one in the class had thought to look on the whiteboard for a sign of a message. Turns out. Mrs B left one. Work to do for the lesson, and a note telling us about a baseline assessment test in Chemistry next Monday. Followed by an ironically placed smiley face. Oh joy.

This hilarious (on our behalf for being so oblivious) but alarming incident made me think. Does being in sixth form really mean more independence and trust? Perhaps? Or even more work upon work and teachers caring less about us.

Legwork! Oh my goodness. I’m a book person. Not active till I need to be. My school has this newfound sadistic system of making sixth form students and teachers run from our main school building, to another one down the road. It’s a considerable distance if you include a 5 minute limit to travelling between lessons, and the signing in and out of all buildings slows this process down a lot. A lot, a lot. I was panicking all the time about being in time for all those lessons, and spent most of my lessons wondering about getting to the next one. Think again, school.

On another note, the décor in the new building is nice. We even have chandeliers in each room. And I’m not even joking. However, the tables are less than apt for subjects (all of them) which require us to lay out our notebooks, textbooks and notes in front of us. Lecture style tables are a no-no. I mean, we can’t even lay the tables straight! Proof? I put my pen down on it and it rolls off.

Classes are a little better now that I’ve settled in more. I think I will need to get used to the ‘wider reading’ part of my studies though. I like reading, but mostly leisure, so we’ll see how this goes. On the bright side, I get an excuse to buy lots of Classics and poetry collections – however, I may find I don’t like Rossetti or Wilde as much now. Pfft. Who am I kidding? I love them even more now!

Rant over, let’s just say this is a whole new experience for me. Despite this being the same school I’ve been to since Year 6, it’s a whole different world when teachers trust you alone in labs filled with various lab tech and equipment. Do you know I once put my finger in a Bunsen burner? There’s a trick, of course, to avoid getting burnt (ironically, taught to me by Mrs B) but still.

I am now going to do work. Like, homework. *sighs* But I shall finish my book first. I forgot how awesome I was, finishing a sizeable book in a day. (Yes, that’s my definition of awesome, unless you think it’s something like defeating Titans.)

~ Persephone

P.S. No, I won’t reveal this Bunsen burner trick on the Internet. Who knows what will happen. (For a reasonable brib- *coughs* No, no.)

“Be who you are…

“Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don’t matter, and those who matter don’t mind.”

This particular quote gave me some grief. Honestly, does not one person remember correctly where it originated from? And no, if someone says Dr Seuss, I will send a cyber chidori your way. Don’t even…

Lady R’s post really got me thinking about this quote. You only get one shot at life, don’t let other people control it and make you miserable. One chance. That’s why I try and ‘work hard, play harder’ because if I don’t do it now, who knows if I’ll get the chance to do all the things I wished for as a child.

In an ideal World, there would be no backstabbers, gossipers and general wrong-doers. Unfortunately, they exist, and in girls’ schools – they are particularly vicious. I’ve never had many friends throughout my life, and as a results, I don’t seem to have cared about these people – possibly because they ignored me too?

I just wanted to remind you that you have friends, and they will always be there for you, and will never judge you. Because when Fate throws lemons at you, you make lemonade, for a picnic with your friends. ^-^

~ Persephone